On Saturday, September 6, 2026, my son and daughter-in-law, along with their six and one-half year-old son, attended the season opener for the UConn football program. They are loyal fans, both of the football and basketball programs, men and women. They went all in on the tailgating and enjoyed their time reveling with other fans, cooking hot dogs and burgers on their small propane gas grill and drinking a few permitted beverages. (This outing was a family event.) At the close of the day, however, they reported to us that on their way to their seats in the stadium, they walked by another tailgater who was flying prominently and high above their location three flags. There was the UConn Flag and beneath it, two other flags. One contained the LGBTQ acronym but attached to it, was a flag communicating a demeaning message through imagery/words “Liberty, Guns, Beer and Tits.” Another prominently displayed flag, just below the ones mentioned above, promoted the phrase, “Never Go Full Retard.” Offended by such hateful displays, my daughter-in-law expressed her feelings of disgust, which was predictably met with offensive language and a misogynistic dismissal. She then secured the aid of a state policeman who informed her that he could do nothing about the hateful messaging because of First Amendment protections.
My daughter-in-law is a UConn alumna and a high school social worker, and she was not about to let this go. So, she drafted an email to the athletic department alerting them to the hateful speech being branded alongside the UConn flag. Much to UConn’s credit, she received an immediate and sympathetic response. An excerpt read:
As someone who works within UConn Athletics, I understand the importance of ensuring that our events are welcoming and respectful environment for everyone. I also take this issue personally as someone who identifies as LGBTQ+ and as someone with a brother with special needs (Down Syndrome), fighting the use of the R word daily for the past 36 years. Those experiences have shaped my understanding of how words, symbols, and conduct can affect members of our community, particularly when they target people who may already face marginalization that cannot fight for themselves.
Flying flags high above tailgating fans has become quite a tradition. I attended last week’s game against Maryland, and flags waving in the afternoon breeze were all over the expansive parking area. There were American flags, UConn flags, Thin Blue Line flags, nationality flags, Smilie-face flags, Maryland flags and more than a few that I didn’t recognize. We found the same flagpole that had the offensive flags the week before. It still had the UConn flag, but the LGBTQ rainbow had been taken down. A new “R” flag was flying but contained no abusive wording. Below it, however, was a newly imprinted flag that said:
If you find this offensive, I find it funny.
That is why I am happier than you.
What kind of person finds this hateful, abusive message funny and believes that this behavior is evidence of happiness?
There is nothing funny about the dehumanization of others in our society.
Nothing funny about conducting an immoral war of choice without regard for its effects on the safety and security of nations, families, schools, hospitals, and economies.
Nothing funny about the inhumane treatment of immigrants in their neighborhoods or in ICE detention camps.
Nothing funny about the cruel treatment of LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters who embrace and celebrate their gender identity.
Nothing funny about the marginalization of those who struggle with the stresses of mental illness.
Nothing funny about conducting a war on children by separating them from their parents and cutting food, health and housing subsidies.
Nothing funny about seeing the rich and famous, powerful and principleless abuse the poor and vulnerable, especially those who are trafficked for sex and whose stories are untold.
Nothing funny, just disgusting and offensive and if you will permit me, sinful beyond measure.
I have mentioned in previous blogs that I keep a list of favorite quotes on my office desk. This one seems appropriate for this blog:
Sin is more than bad behavior. It’s a heart condition that results in bad behavior.
(Paul David Tripp)
Those flags that were lifted high above a partying group of UConn fans revealed a heart condition that resulted in really bad behavior. They are the physical evidence of a spiritual illness, a heart condition, if you will, hearts filled with animosity, grievance and hate. And sadly, both the heart condition and the resulting behavior are far too pervasive throughout this administration, its allies and across the nation.
In a recent feature article for The Atlantic, “Why So Many People Think Trump Is Good,” David Brooks opined:
Today we live in a world in which many, or even most, people no longer have a sense that there is a permanent moral order to the universe.
Indeed, I think that we have become far too tolerant of a shifting descending immoral order.
Citing the work and words of Ted Clayton, a political scientist at Central Michigan, Brooks cites a Clayton quote::
… today we live in a fragmented society made up of individuals who have no conception of the common good, no way to come together to pursue the common good, no way to persuade one another what the common good might be, and indeed, most of us believe that the common good does not and cannot exist.
In a transcript of Brooks’ debut podcast of “The Permanent Questions with David Brooks,” I read yet another quote/observation that was very thought provoking:
As my career has gone on, I came to the conclusion that we as a society are over-politicized and under-moralized. …America seems to be going through some sort of spiritual, relational and social and maybe moral crisis. You know all the stats: rising loneliness, rising despair, rising distrust, rising polarization…. We’re living through a period of technological advance, but we’re losing our humanistic core. Because of technological improvements and social deterioration, our lives are objectively better, but subjectively worse. The elements of civilization that lift the spirit and nurture the affections are playing a smaller and smaller role in our national life. Religion, literature, art, theology, history, philosophy, friendship, even conversation.
As a nation, we are going through a moral crisis, a crisis that threatens our fundamental humanity and influences how we relate to one another. Nothing funny about that! I would like to think that the church and the Christian faith to which we are called are among those ‘elements of civilization.’ They are meant to lift the spirit and nurture affections that draw us together, not pull us apart, affirming one another in our rich diversity. I don’t recall seeing a Christian flag flying high upon someone’s flagpole last Saturday. If I had I may have started to sing one of my favorite hymns: “Lift high the cross, the love of Christ proclaim.” Gladly would I proclaim that love and promise that it will address whatever, heart condition we may have and empower us to live lives of justice and generosity, compassion, kindness and peace.
During my pastorate, I was fond of using scripture for our assurance of pardon after our prayer of confession. My favorite was taken from the prophet Jeremiah 31:31-34:
31 The days are surely coming, says the Lord, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah. 32 It will not be like the covenant that I made with their ancestors when I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt—a covenant that they broke, though I was their husband, says the Lord. 33 But this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, says the Lord: I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 34 No longer shall they teach one another or say to each other, “Know the Lord,” for they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, says the Lord, for I will forgive their iniquity and remember their sin no more.
The days are not coming but are here; the time is now for us to embrace the covenant of love, which is written upon our hearts. From the least to the greatest, our sin is forgiven and we are made healthy and whole, and may I add, truly happy..